Thread:IcepetalTheIceSilkWing/@comment-39024013-20190710041601

Very creative concept, the prologue especially was gripping and was a good start to this story. I only have a few critics for this one, but it was probably just tryping errors:

Her mother, who had no time to cook anymore after her dad up and left.

Not sure what 'up and left' meant.

Oddly, it was the teens who didn't just staring with terror at they sky, before being yanked along with adults.

I would rewrite it as 'it was the teens who weren't just staring with terror at the sky'.

Kaze nodded, and took off again, aiming for dragons, and pulling them inside.

There wasn't much indication on what 'inside' was. Maybe try writing what the building was? Besides those few sentences, this seems pretty good so far. I look forward to more! 